Cobra on the loose in Thousand Oaks

Where’s Rikki-Tikki-Tavi when you need him?

A dangerous cobra has escaped onto the streets of tony Thousand Oaks, prompting authorities there to urge residents to keep children away from potential hiding spots, and jokesters to create at least three Twitter accounts for the runaway reptile.

“Ugh. Imposter cobras fanning out everywhere,” one offered. “Time to strike back — how hard is it for a snake to get verified on Twitter, @realDonaldTrump?”

The snake is an albino monocled cobra, and instead of being hunted by plucky mongoose Rikki-Tikki-Tavi of Rudyard Kipling’s “Jungle Book” fame, the Los Angeles County Department of Animal Care and Control and California fish and wildlife officials are tracking the snake.

All joking aside, the snake is extremely dangerous. Monocled cobras are common throughout parts of Asia. Their bite can be deadly, and they can be quick to strike, snake experts say.

“They never chill out. They never relax,” according to the website Thailand Snakes. “They are always ready to serve up a plate of death for you — if you’re dumb enough to get too close.”

The snake has already bitten a dog, state officials say, and they’re warning parents to steer kids clear of snakes and animal burrows, pipes or culverts where the snake might try to hide.

The dog, in case you’re wondering, is going to be OK. It was treated and released from a veterinary hospital, according to KTLA.

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